So I've like come across one of the stupidest songs in the world. I usually don't get much opportunity to come across stupid songs because I'm highly selective in what I hear but since my bro has taken over my car, he's changed all the radio presets (i.e.: now featuring a horde of commercial radio stations, much to my absolute disgust). So I turned on the engine of my car and heard the stupidest lyrics in the world...

"Oh I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair"

Maybe there was a very brief period of which I might have accidentally skimmed past whereby punk rockers actually wore flowers in their hair then realised that it didn't at all fit with their anarchist ideals... but when the fuck did punk rockers wear FLOWERS in their hair? Like, wtf, man!

"In 77 and 69 revolution was in the air,
I was born too late into a world that doesn't care"

Two completely different decades, two completely different 'movements'. Peace, anarchy, anarchy, peace... anyone? And umm, hello, people STILL DO care, if not even more so than before. No one gave a shit about the environment back in 69, otherwise things today would have been different. It SEEMED like people cared because it was the trend at the time. Think about it. Teenagers in 69 will be what... about 50-60 years old now? If they really DID care about a revolution, the world will be revolutionised NOW because the whole world is being run by these peeps. The whole 'peace' thing was in most cases just some thing they did cos it was 'cool' and as soon as they hit 25 and realised that they had to work and earn a living, they got sucked into the capitalist world, the 'rat race' if you will, and lost all their beliefs that they thought they had. Only those who REALLY cared still do good today... but these people aren't the masses. Trend, peoples.

"When the head of state didn't play guitar"

What the fuck is that supposed to mean. What's wrong with the head of state playing guitar??? And what made them not play guitar back in "69" and "77"??

"Not everybody drove a car"

Maybe this is the least stupidest line, but in spirit of my 'bag the shit out of this song' mood, I'm just going to say that cars at the time weren't as affordable as they are now and the economy back then wasn't as strong. If cars were affordable and public transport wasn't so shit and expensive, we'd see a different trend there.

"When music really mattered and when radio was king"

Well, with songs like this out on the market I am not surprised music doesn't matter now. Fuck me. Music STILL matters, just ask the talented few.

"When accountants didn't have control"

Since when accountants ever had control? As far as I know, they are always working for other people.

"And the media couldn't buy your soul"

Well, this song isn't helping it either is it?? Being played 92349910238394 times on the radio a day, this song is depleting the intelligence of young children and teaching them wrong music history and history in general, sandwiched between 3000 ads. Now don't tell me that isn't buying your soul. And what about those ads back then in the 60s!! They were fucking lame yet everyone believed in them and that's why stuff sold...! Like in the 50s or something - "Buy WHITE GOODS, like this brilliant FRIDGE for your home and you will suddenly feel domesticated! All wives should have this latest washing machine because you ain't a wife if you ain't got the Super-Fast-Spin-Wash-3000!" Like that isn't buying your soul. I mean, in Karl Marx's "The Communist Manifesto", he outlines that advertising bought your soul and that true individuality is lost because advertising makes everyone feel they want things that they don't need. Wants are becoming needs. And when was this manisfesto written? Well, it was first published in 1848. 1848, peoples. The media was buying your soul a very long time ago. AND, to top that off, I'm sure people are more sceptical NOW to biased news channels than ever before.

"And computers were still scary and we didn't know everything."

Computers back then were huge but weren't monster-like and I haven't heard of a computer ever biting anyone. And we STILL don't know everything, that is why we have education - to learn and discover new things. This person obviously has not had any education, thinking that we already KNOW everything, and hence why this song is so bad.

"When pop-stars still remained a myth"

Pop stars remained a myth? Erm, The Beatles, Elvis Prestley, etc etc?

"And ignorance could still be bliss"

Ignorance is always bliss. I bet she wasn't freaking out about global warming before she watched that Al Gore doco!

"And when God Saved the Queen she turned a whiter shade of pale"

What? People are STILL conservative, y'know.

"When my mom and dad were in their teens"

Yes, that's true. Now stick to the truth, please.

"And anarchy was still a dream"

You want to be a punk rocker but anarchy was still a dream? What kind of punk rocker are you?? Oh yeah... one with flowers in her hair, that's it. And besides, you said "77"... the days of anarchy, my dear.

"And the only way to stay in touch was a letter in the mail"

And telephone!

"When record shops were still on top,
And vinyl was all that they stocked
And the super info highway was still drifting out in space"

I bet she doesn't even own one piece of vinyl, let alone a record player.

"Kids were wearing hand me downs,
And playing games meant kick around
And footballers still had long hair and dirt across their face"

Yeah, I'm not complaining about these lines. I would have spewed if this song got any more ridiculous.

LAME LAME LAME song. I heard it again at work (omg, the MUSIC IS SO BAD AT WORK I WANT TO THROW MYSELF INTO A POOL OF SHARKS WITH FRICKIN LASER BEAMS ATTACHED TO THEIR HEADS) and I wanted to stab the speakers.

Seriously... there is SO MUCH GOOD music out there. I can list 100s of aweomse artists right now. SOOOOOOOO MUCH GOOD MUSIC. So WHY DOES SHIT LIKE THIS MAKE IT TO THE TOP?!??!

And so it's things like this that make me shun mainstream music and commercial stations in general because this shit is fucked up.

There. I rest my case.