These can help your shopping experience to be a better one by knowing that you aren't pissing off the shopkeepers.

Case Numero Uno:
After spending 10 mintues to tidy up a pile of clothing someone comes and takes a look at the item. Decides that he/she likes it he/she starts rummaging for desired size. I offer to help "Can I help find a size for you?" but the customer refuses thinking that he/she is doing me a favour by doing things him/herself. Er, NOT. Customer completely ruins previously immaculate pile just for 1 piece of clothing that he/she probably wouldn't buy anyway. Moral of the story: Always let the shop assistant help you. ALWAYS.

Case Nummer Zwei:
There are stickers on folded t-shirts that are visible whilst sitting in a pile. USE THESE STICKERS to find your size. You don't have to always look at the tag on the neck for the size. Same goes to size rings on hangers. The size is indicated on the hangers! We spent thousands of dollars on these stickers and size rings so it is more convenient for you to find the size that you want almost immediately. Stop rummaging and destroying immaculate piles!!! Moral of the story: Always look for size indicators before you look at the tag of the clothing item. It saves you time anyway.

Case 3 (I can't be bothered with the different language thing anymore):
The next time you shop at Armani Exchange, the price of the clothing IS NOT IN THE AUTHENTICITY TAG!!! The authenticity tag is just a tag that says you're purchasing a GENUINE Armani item. There's a proper plastic tag that sits right next to the authenticity tag with the PRICE. It's so obvious! So stop opening the authenticity tag and ruining it just because you want to find the price because it is clearly visible. And we find it excutiatingly painful and embarassing (on your behalf) when you ask us "What's up with this? Is it so expensive that you don't want to tell us the price of this item?" The price is there. And stop opening the authenticity tag envelope. It's mighty annoying having to put them back into place and makes a mess and makes the whole store look disgusting. Moral of the story: Don't be an idiot.

Case 4:
Our logo tees may be $59 and therefore relatively expensive compared to t-shirts from other stores but it is, quite frankly, the cheapest item of clothing in our store. Please don't get us to steam the t-shirt you are purchasing just because it is $20 more than what you'll pay at Supre or something else similar. We'll look at you funny and tell you to get a life. Moral of story: Only get us to steam an item of clothing for you if it is over $300.

Case 5:
Do not bring in your screaming menace-type kids into our store and DO NOT think it is cute because the kid is blowing bubbles with his/her saliva into our mirrors. It is NOT cute and is simply disgusting for us to clean up. And don't think its funny that the kid doesn't listen to shop assistants to stop running around and playing hide and seek with his/her siblings because our store is a OH&S lawsuit waiting to happen. Have you seen how sharp the edges of our METAL GRIDS are? You could take a brain out with one of those. Moral of story: Be a responsible parent.

Case 6:
Don't just leave all the clothing that you have just tried in the fitting room (or worse, on the floor), take them out when you're done and give them to us so we can put them back on the floor. This also gives us the assurance that you are not seedy and haven't stolen anything. What are we? Chopped liver? Moral of the story: Take everything out of the change room when you're done.

Case 7:
If you have broken a metal hanger, or anything else in the store, TELL US. Don't leave it lying around unnoticed because you'll hurt someone and we'll get the blame. Moral of the story: You must REALLY be clumsy to have broken a thick metal hanger or have a fixture collapse on you.

Case 8:
Do not take clothing off the manniquins. We are here to do that for you.

Case 9:
Don't look at shop assistants in a way that just because we are shop assitants we subsequently have no bright future. Moral of the story: Most of us are students and may end up being far more successful than you ever will. That or your future prime minister.

Case 10:
If my manager doesn't authorise it, don't think sweet talking me will change anything. You think I actually want to risk getting fired just because you want that item soooooo badly but don't want to pay the full price JUST because the authenticity tag is damaged? Moral of the story: Unless you wear your clothing with your tags attached, please don't attempt such futile activities.

There. That's all I can think of right now. There's a whole lot more where that came from but I will need to go to work to get some more inspiration.

x